{October 22, 2013}   Unbeliever

she wants to see herself in every word
but finds herself lacking
afraid to fly for fear of failure,
a leftover habit from before,
so instead she remains an unbeliever,
not out of desire, because it’s cold in this place,
not a person alive would wish for this,
there are shadows here equipped with claws
and everything is dark and silent,
she wants to be the heroine in every story
but knows she can’t be saved,
her happy ever after was doomed from the start,
maybe a result of a former life or just plain fucked-up,
though the why doesn’t matter when it just is,
so she skates through the days and dreams through the nights,
if she’s lucky he comes to her in those late hours,
sometimes she sees his face but always she feels his breath on her skin
and his scent stays with her for days,
it’s all in her mind, she tells herself,
because it can’t be true, none of it,
she waits for the curtain to fall, the silence to settle in,
the click of the lock that keeps her trapped inside herself,
the way she was trained
before she was abandoned


CherryPickens says:

It’s a harsh one. Jangles inside of me. I like it, because the words make me feel.

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