joannebest











{August 7, 2013}   I’m Sorry

sorryneon
I owe you an apology.
And yes, I mean you. If your eyes are reading these words then this apology belongs to you because I haven’t been living up to my end of the deal.
I know, there is no actual deal, but it goes without saying that when you take the time to leave a comment here then the least I can do is comment back, right?
Rude I tell ya, it can be downright rude, yet still there are comments I’ve yet to respond to and guilt-girl that I am, the fact that I haven’t responded to each and every comment yet (operative word being ‘yet’) weighs heavy on my mind and has now entered Things I Worry About In The Middle Of The Night territory.

I could give you a play by play, a list of the millions of reasons something so very important to me continues, for the most part, to get pushed aside, all rational reasons, legitimate Real Life Gets In The Way reasons, but they all add up to the same thing: comments you have so kindly and generously taken the time to leave me still remain unanswered. Not unseen, just unanswered.
sorrycalm
I wasn’t raised to be rude, it’s more of a spiral I’ve been caught up in these last few years months, and again, there is no excuse good enough for my inaction, but there they are, excuses.

And I should not be excused, I should be punished {crosses fingers hoping to get a forgiving grin out of you} but I do sincerely beg your forgiveness and kind understanding. You see, when it comes down to it, I am already punishing myself with the mental beat-downs, my inner voice screeches like a harpy nearly 24 hours a day and the weight of this guilt hangs heavy on a daily basis.
sorry
It hasn’t escaped my notice that in the time it took me to write this I probably could have replied to a good handful of comments (or installed a cat door because I swear I’ve just opened and closed the door at least 77 times as four different cats can’t decide if they want to stay in or go out, they scratch at the door or keep tapping me with their paws, depending on which side of the door they are on), but I felt the need to apologize en masse, sort of like my cyber version of walking around with a scarlet letter on my chest.

So I shall wrap up my public apology with one last beg for your forgiveness, and try my best to manage my time in a more, umm, timely manner.
Oh and one more thing, I can not adequately describe how much I appreciate each and every one of your comments, they are like manna falling from the skies and they sustain me during this adjustment period of my New Normal without my Mom, as much as they say you aren’t prepared to ever lose a loved one, I am finding it’s a lot worse than I ever could have imagined.
Love whoever you love, and make sure you tell them you love them, always.
sorrycat

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Unless it was a totally personal comment, I never expect a response. Otherwise, WP could consume every waking minute. Don’t beat yourself up over this. Just keep writing 🙂



I agree with Pamela. Finding time to read, write, comment and reply is a tricky thing to master when there is Real Life to fit in there somewhere too.



I don’t answer a lot of the comments I leave either. 🙂 And besides you are at the Jersey shore!



Andy says:

Forgiveness for you abounds in Manchester, UK.



Hope you are having a nice break and enjoy the summer!



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